What I learned this week...

All the calamities of the world can't scale the walls of my indifference.
But the tears of my wife, wash the walls away like waves on a sandcastle.
The generosity of the body of Christ breaks the gates like a strong army.
I am left humbled, knowing I am not as strong nor hard as I thought.

I reserve the right to delete this at any time...read fast.

Cadenne Update Cross Posting

For more info and back story see the McDaris Family Blog.

It is with much thanksgiving and praise to the Lord that we write this update for you today. As you have seen, Cadenne is now ECMO-free! The doctors are all thrilled with her quick progress. As sick as she was when she arrived here at Children's, none of them thought she would be off this soon. We know that God is the Great Physician, and has had his healing hand on her from the beginning. It was so wonderful to see that massive cart being rolled away... AWAY from our baby! What a blessing!



Cadenne did extremely well with her first day off of ECMO. Her blood gases have been great, and her oxygen levels have also been good. She spent some of the day "riding the machine," which is basically her body letting the ventilator take over for her while she is asleep. Other parts of the day she was taking breaths in addition to what the machine was doing for her. Surgeons were watching her closely all day and have made the decision to go ahead with her repair surgery tomorrow. She is an add-on case, and has 4 other surgeries on the schedule before her, so she likely won't go in until late morning or early afternoon.

Initially, the surgeon we spoke to said they would try doing the surgery orthoscopically, where they make tiny incisions in discrete places and do the repair in a way that is minimally invasive, with the understanding that they may have to go in and do a larger incision if that didn't work. Later in the day, after the surgeons had a pow-wow, they decided that it was best for Cadenne just to do the bigger incision. It is a MUCH shorter surgery, and with the level of pulmonary hypertension that she had, they think it is likely that they'll end up with the bigger incision anyway. They believe the hole is quite large and that a patch will be needed. (rather than just stitching the diaphragm up.)

Please pray that the Lord would guide the surgeons' hands, that the hole is easier to repair than they think it will be, and that Cadenne will recover quickly. Since they're going with the larger incision, she is likely to be in a lot more pain. Please pray that her pain would be managed well. Lastly, pray for the function of her lungs... that the surgery will help them to inflate even more. She is still experiencing some pulmonary hypertension, so hopefully after the surgery, that will ease up a bit. And most importantly, pray that our God would be made famous through all of this, that it will be clear that He deserves our worship.

We know that Cadenne is in good hands. The surgeons are top notch. We are confident that this surgery--the third in nine days--will be good for her. We are by no means out of the woods yet, but this is the next big hurdle that needs to be jumped!

Earlier today the respiratory therapist was changing the tape around Cadenne's ventilator and told me to get the camera out so that I could get a picture of (almost) her whole face. I jumped at that chance! Isn't she pretty?

Pics of the New Baby

Here are pictures of my brand new baby.


This is her room. Yes, all the equipment is for her.


She has CDH and she is on an ECMO (heart/lung bypass).
There are only four hospitals in California that offer ECMO.


Pray. For more information click here. Soli Deo Gloria.

A Recent Prayer

My God and my Lord,
To You alone I pray
Because you alone created every thing

It was You that came down to save me
It was You that created a heart of life in this once dead man
It was You that gave me eyes that see and ears that hear

You saved me not from the consequences of my sins
You saved me from the consequence of my sin nature
You saved me from the consequence of Your righteous judgment

Lord please forgive me for seeking pleasures other than You
Lord please forgive me for my pride that boasts in things other than You
Lord please forgive me for the passions that fail to glorify You

You gave me all that I have
You gave me my wife and my children
You gave me the ring in my ear, Master

By Your grace alone I stand before You
By Your grace alone I stand as head of my house
By Your grace alone I stand in the gap

With Your outstretched arm You have crushed Your enemies
With Your outstretched arm You have terrified whole nations
With Your outstretched arm You have lead me with steadfast love

Into Your arms I place all I have
Into Your arms I place all I fear
Into Your arms I place all my trust

Amen

Arms of God

I listen to quite a bit of secular music. One of my current favorite bands is Corrosion of Conformity. Their latest release is titled In The Arms of God. It amazes me that men of the world can get so close to Truth. Here are the lyrics to the title song, last on the album. The song is extraordinarily powerful. The words alone are not enough. If you want to hear it we can work that out.

Arms Of God

Words make fuel the power of fools to be used
Shadow you cast the longer it gets the shorter you last
Back to the wall now the one that you serve has abandoned your call
Desire backfires you become the opposed where you once had aspired
And you fall from the arms of God!
Sins are ignored the price you paid has been paid once before
Storm has revealed clarity brewing now it's you that is ruined
Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise!
Cast the veil the splinter has turned to a nail
Light has revealed your soul is beginning to seal
Visions have appeared delusions of death drawing near
Truth sets you free all along you were blind... now you see
As you fall from the arms of God!
Frozen still your freedom is testing your will
Pain has receded now you've lost your own will to believe! Believe!
Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise!
You're at war with your God...
These are the things that condition the man
Seldom shown the ways to understand
Heart was still beating but you know it was true
Locked in the cage and shown the wrong view
Standing alone like a lightning rod...
Sleep tight my friend you're in the arms of God!

You have not...

From the beginning of our difficulties with this pregnancy we have wanted the help and prayers of our brothers and sisters in Christ. I want the people I worship with involved in my life. I am blessed with a healthy church family. We have often been asked by our church family to give updates on Cadenne Hope. That is a relatively easy request to fulfill. But at this past concert of prayer I came across a request that was not so easy, One of the elders simply asked, "How are you doing?" I answered, "Tired." I went on to mention a couple of reasons why, none of which seemed adequate. Now that I have been able to reflect upon it a little longer, I think I have a better answer. I have been anxious. And sinfully so.

I continue to be anxious even though I know Matt. 6:25-34 tells me I shouldn't be anxious. I know that my God is the God of Israel, the God that provided even after their sinful unbelief in the wilderness. He was still faithful to His people. How often will I fret about material provisions instead of seeking His righteousness? (Philippians 4:6) He has always proven Himself faithful to His own. In this, my "wilderness experience", I find myself tempted to side with the ten spies, those that thought the taking of the promised land was beyond their abilities. They were right. Joshua and Caleb say as much in Num 14:5-10: "the Lord is with us".

In every sense is not that enough? If God is for me, who can be against me? I can see how He has cared for both the birds and George Muller, surely I fall some where between those two. I wish to live out the trust I profess in God, that His love would cast out this fear in particular.

Just Following Instructions

From the Pyros. Thanks Guys.

Sometimes Blessings Stink

Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Romans 5:1-5

If you read the Cadenne Hope Updates, you will know where this post comes from.

As for how this post relates to the post below, this would be a post on subject B) Stop pretending that you're OK. We know differently.

It seems that God has chosen to have me move beyond theological theories, and into the realm of living out the hope He has given to me. While we all understand that God is knitting our little girl together in Tricia's womb, we don't necessarily understand why He decided to skip a knit one, pearl two. I would like to think it is for the same reason the man in John 9:1-3 was born blind: to reveal God's glory.

The theory I had been formulating was a simple one. Given that we are sinners in a fallen world, pain is good. To quote Westley "Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something." But why would I argue that pain is good? Two reasons; 1) Pain as a diagnostic tool indicates that something is wrong and needs to change. Thomas Covenant longs for pain. This leads to reason 2) Pain also indicates life (that is you're not dead yet), which means there is time to correct the condition that is causing the pain.

I realize I have not suffered to the same extent as the great saints of the faith. As a result I do not have the endurance nor the character of a great man of God. For now I will rejoice in the suffering that my Lord has allotted me, content with the hope He is pouring out for His glory.

Post Script
I have come to understand a third reason that pain is good. It gives an opportunity for the body of Christ to be the arms of God that hold and comfort those that suffer.

Some Times Life is Like...

I can think of three different post to go with this picture. A) Covering up the old man doesn't work. It still stinks. You really need the deep cleaning. B) Stop pretending that your OK, we know differently. C) Air fresheners can't do what fresh air will. More on that later.

Not so Good News

My wife and I had some bad news this week. Tricia is 25 weeks pregnant and some complications were found. Read the updates here. If you would like to be on the e-mail prayer list, email me here.

I will post as I often as I am able. I know you understand.

Jockey For Position [Pinky and The Brain]

For the education of Ania. For the rest of you guys, remember the glory days.

Remember: Fear God.

One of my Elders preached straight to my heart last Sunday.You can listen here (warning: direct link to a 20mb file).

This sermon inspired this prayer.

My Lord God, You scare me.
I have been overwhelmed by Your power.
As you have humbled kings You have humbled me.
Fearing You is the beginning of wisdom.
Please forgive me for being a fool.
Your might has crushed cities and nations.
Yet I have been a coward in front of mockers
rather than being awestruck before you, my God.
You have broken me. I am Yours.
I thought too little of You, Lord. I thought You smaller than You are.
I have read the Prophets say, "From You there is no hiding place,"
But acted as though I could hide evil in the darkness of my heart.
To lay prostrate before You would be to esteem myself too highly.
If it was not for your mercy I would be unable to stand.
I am terrified by your wrath. Only Your arm can save me.
Yours is the glory so great that to see it would be death to the sinner.
Forgive me.

Recommended listening; Stavesacre, Zzyzx Scarecrow(iTunes link)

Update or What I Did While You Were Away.

First off the family update. Read it here and here. Second up, I am working on a writing project for church. It is very exciting, although I often feel like a grasshopper in a land of giants. It is a great challenge.

Oh, and my golf clubs where stolen last week. Bummer. I should have known better.

Opposing Sin and Evil

One of the guys at Scriptorium Daily has issued a call to arms, so to speak. In an effort to help extend this call to the outside of the Ivory Towers of Academia, I am posting the link for all seven of my visitors.

Unscheduled Break

For my friends in the blog world, July has been horrible. My struggling business is down (worst month of the year). My work truck has broken down twice each time losing a day of work. My wife was in the hospital for four days (she is OK now, but it was quite a scare).

On the bright side, I am working on a writing project for church. That means all my time for writing in the near future will go to that project.

I should be back in a couple of weeks.

Figure Skating

This is the male equivalent of figure skating.

A Simple Question

Let me get right to the point. Is the concept of respect having to be earned a biblical concept?
Everyone seems to agree that love should be unconditional. Why not respect also? Most of the ladies will say, "But they are two totally different things!" I understand and acknowledge that as a viable perspective, but since when has the Christian life been about you? Aren't you supposed to be "others" focused? As I have mentioned before, a large percentage of men perceive love and respect to be exactly the same thing. Many men will tell you that absent respect there can't be love. Therefore if the "other" you are focused on sees respect as love, and we know that you want to love them in their native tongue (so to speak), shouldn't you respect unconditionally?

Giving the Gift of Wicked!

I gave my wife Tricia and my oldest daughter Karissa (7) a little gift of "Girl Time". Check out the details here please.

Never Turns to More

It seems like eons ago when Dan Phillips posted this question about continuing sin at Pyros.

Towards the end of the post he says,

One last twist: could you throw yourself in there? I could. The problem isn't really just Them, is it? Would that it were. Why does not my holiness grow and deepen more apace? Whatever "those people" pray, I know that I pray (and you pray) for growth in holiness. Why is it so slow? Why are sins so stubborn, and graces so seemingly ephemeral? Sins die so hard, graces grow so agonizingly slowly.

I think I will put myself in there. As Dave Grohl has said, "I've gotta confession to make."
So here I go. Hello, my name is Brian, and I'm a habitual speeder. And not your run of the mill five over the speed limit type either. More like twenty. One more thing...I don't feel bad about it.

That's just wrong. I occasionally feel a pang of guilt, but it passes quickly. But why do I persist? Is it the fleeting pleasure of of the sin? I'll be the first to admit that going fast sure is fun. So why has this "work of the devil" not been "destroyed" by Christ? He annihilated my desire to use methamphetamine more than a decade ago. So why not my desire to play "Double the Speed Limit?" Why has He left that desire standing?

To presume the motives of God is a scary thing. Thus, I will try to restrict myself to what He has revealed in His word. So why am I not granted instant holiness?

It may seem odd, but consider Balaam from Numbers 22:22. Everybody knows the story. Balaam's donkey sees the angel of the Lord set a pick, and does what any good donkey would do. It wanders off in to a nearby field. Twice more the angel sets the pick, with the last one the donkey just gives up and lies down. Then, of course, God gives voice to the donkey.

Moral of the story so far: When you see your friend is headed toward the judgment of God, be an ass. Eventually, God may speak though you and save your friend's life.

So how does this apply to the question at hand? We see Balaam repent. What did it take? Crisis. We all have times when we need a good smack upside the head. Sometimes it has to sting more than others, because at different times our skulls tend to change in density. Ultimately I believe it has to do with the fact that some sins bring us greater pleasure over a longer season than other sins.

It also tells me that I lack the proper perspective. I am not seeing my sin in relation to a real and coming judgment. This tells me my faith is small. In some measure I do not have the assurance of things hoped for (judgment by a righteous God in this case) but not seen. I believe that the reason God allowed me to go on in this sin was the minor crisis of writing this post. As I wrote, it became clear what my insubordination to civil authority really is: Thumbing my nose at my God. I thank God that this time the crisis was minor, merely reflecting on my sin in contrast with the righteousness of God. For the most part I have slowed down, and when I don't at least I feel bad about it.

Sometimes it is better to be Nineveh than Israel. Pray that God would break you...softly.

Recommended Reading: Ps. 139

Recommended Listening: Stavesacre's Acquiesce iTunes Link Lyrics found here

My Wife and my iPod.

I haven't posted in a while. I have been working on a reply to the Dan's post and I've got nothin', well nearly nothin'.

Yesterday, my wife touched my heart in a special way. After church we went out to lunch. As we were exiting the car, Tricia hands me forty-five bucks. Of course I give her the "Where did this come from?" look. So she tells me, "I've been saving the cash you leave me, so I could buy you a new iPod." I was floored. That she would take what I had given to bless her, she was going to use to bless me. It made my eyes misty. Tricia is the best wife ever.

iPod™ Update

I finally replaced my stolen iPod™. Yea for me. I bought an "open box" 30gig in black. I saved about $55. That means I am happy on many levels. I thought I would use this opportunity to share my most played list as shown in iTunes™.

Be Back Soon!

I have been super busy and super lazy, hence no posting. I should have something up this weekend!

Thanks for stopping by, see you soon.

Christian Sees Those Ahead...

Sunday nights are generally when my wife and I meet with our small group. We normally talk about that day's sermon. We are presently in the middle of a series on gender, sort of along the lines of Restoring Biblical Manhood and Womanhood.

Near the end of last Sunday night's meeting, I brought up a survey that I read that says a lot of men see love and respect as synonymous terms. Most women, on the other hand, see these terms as very distinct from each other.

The discussion that followed seemed to reinforce that very idea. Early on, our group leader, Mr. Jones, said something to the effect of, "I don't think you can have love without respect." Later on he asked the question, "So is it possible to love someone you don't respect?" He did so in his usual manner, which is to say in an open and honest manner, lacking any tone of condescension or disapproval of the notion.

Immediately the lovely Mrs. Jones answered something to the effect of, "Yes, you can love someone without respecting them. You won't follow someone you don't respect, but you can still love them." Her response had no hint of trepidation or sarcasm. It was truly uninhibited, (yet) loving and respectful. Mr. Jones nodded an understanding nod.

This exchange was a beautiful example of a Husband moving beyond his own perspective and including the perspective of his Bride. This exchange gave me the impression that Mr. Jones has been loving his wife as Christ loves the Church. It was natural and flowing, giving the impression that this is the normal course of their conversations.

Mr. Jones' willingness to question his own paradigm in an effort to understand how others think and feel was inspirational to me. I hope to one day to be more like him.

This post was posted with the permission of Mr. Jones. Yes, that is his real name.

Big News!!!

Yes, really big, read all about it on the McDaris Family Blog. Go read it now, I'll wait here.

Announcement: Cigar and Theology

Just a heads-up for those of you in the L.A./Orange county area: I will be hosting a Cigar and Theology Night in the near future.

In addition to the fine cigar and theology you bring, there will be good beer and tasty ice cream. Partaking of cigars and beer is not required, but extreme peer pressure will be applied to those who plan not to eat ice cream.

I'm still working on a place and time. If you are interested, send an email to: ibeabrian@gmail.com.

I think the topic up for discussion will most likely be, "The persistence of sin in the life of the believer." I think one of the Pyro bloggers mentioned it a month or so ago (maybe on one of the solo blogs) but I can't find it now. If you remember reading the post and know where it is, let me know, please.

UPDATE: Link to the proposed discussion topic found here.
h/t to Even so... at VoV.

Texas

A couple of weeks ago, my wife and I went to the great state of Texas for a business meeting. We arrived a day early so we could have more time to sightsee and hang out. We stayed at the Gaylord Texan in Grapevine. Nice place, really. The business part of the trip was as expected with the usual meetings on how to sell more effectively, and get some deals on what I sell.

Tricia was able to meet some of her friends from Texas. The food was good, the people were nice and now I know that "all y'all" is the plural of "y'all".

My wife made a funny.

Here it is. And while you're there check out what my one year boy old can do.

Kevin Rocks! (or Rhymes)

Kevin over at Encyclopedia Kevinannica wrote a little diddy worthy of link. Thanks for the shout out.

This comes with a big H/T to Ann at Everyday in Grace. Really, check her blog, good stuff!

And since Kevin mentioned it is National Poetry Month, I thought I would repost my last (read "most recent", and yes that is a threat that I may do it again) cheesy poem.

Seaside Single Wide
(A Trailer Trash epic)

Found my spot on the shoreline
Ten paces to the dry side of high tide
Is where I'll park my trailer in no time
My own little seaside single wide

Toes in sand, I lean back in a resin chair
With an Avo burning and a cold Guinness
Watch the sun setting, smell the sea in the air
What tomorrow brings, I couldn't care less

I woke before dawn to a new sensation
A storm blew in, and the waves washed me out
So now my single wide is floating in the ocean
Along with a sinking feeling and rising doubt

Quickly find my single wide is not seaworthy
As it has already become an aquatic habitat
I was swimming in a riptide by six thirty
Using a resin chair as a make shift raft

Homeless but alive on a rocky shore
With nothing ahead of me but sheer cliffs
I begin to climb soon my body is sore
Takes forever and a day to reach the precipice

Exhausted on the plateau I can only lay
On this hard flat and steady stone
Both of us warmed by the sun's ray
Thinking this is where I'll build my home

Integrity:Despised

in·teg·ri·ty

1. Steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code.
2. The state of being unimpaired; soundness.
3. The quality or condition of being whole or undivided; completeness.

In Genesis 25:34 we can read the culmination of a transaction that had more ramifications then either the seller or buyer may have realized. In this story there are no good guys. Esau sold his birthright for a bowl of stew. We know why he did this: He had a felt need. It also seems that he would not have been surprised if he did not live long enough to enjoy the benefits of his birthright. On the other side, we have the supplanter. He low-balls the value of the birthright, taking advantage of his brother's desperation. Can you say "brotherly love"?

de·spise

1. To regard with contempt or scorn.
2. To dislike intensely; loathe.
3. To regard as unworthy of one's interest or concern.

All that to get to this: We can despise our integrity in much the same way as Esau did his birthright. How often do we feel that a "need" of the present is worth more than our integrity? How often have I traded my own wholeness (and holiness) for a bowl of stew? That stew could be a little extra (ill-gotten) cash to help ends meet, the lie told to avoid a confrontation (including the words left unsaid), or the spouse that cheats (as well as the spouse that neglects) because it is easier than being naked with each other.

Every transaction has a supplier and a consumer. Had Jacob not enabled the transaction, had he provided for his kin without guile, would the deceit of Genesis 27 been necessary? How often have I enabled or encouraged the fall of my brother for my own gain? Truly, more than I care to remember.

In each of these, we have less concern for being undivided, whole and sound than we do for satisfying a felt need. I find examples all over Scripture. I also find examples strewn throughout my life. It pains me because I know it reflects a lack of faith. It says, "God, I don't think You are going to take care of this need, and even though I know this option I came across doesn't square with Your Word I am going to go my way." Could there be another reason I would fail to stand in the wisdom and promises of God? I don't think so. Am I my brother's keeper? Yes I am. Likewise, you are my keeper.

A Quality How-To

If more of us that name the name of Christ acted like they believed He commanded us to care for the widows and the poor, maybe we wouldn't need a welfare system.

Until then, here are the least of these. Matt. 25:31-46

Quick Notes From Out of Town

Hi Y'all,
I've been in the great state of Texas since Wednesday. I've noticed something here: There is a lot more state pride in Texas than in California, if state flags are any indicator.

I have some ideas for future posts, so please stay tuned.

Scars: Reminders of Lessons Learned

Let us start with a couple of traffic facts. Fact one: Everybody that drives a car is an idiot. Fact two: Everybody that rides a motorcycle is crazy. Not all to the same degree, mind you, but crazies and idiots nonetheless.

I'm a bit of both, as you might have guessed. I ride a motorcycle every day but Sunday, which happens to be the only day I wear long pants.

One work day, I dropped off my work truck and rode the motorcycle home where my wonderful bride was waiting for me with bated breath. (See facts one and two again.) As is my custom, I was "sharing" lanes on a surface street. The rest of traffic stopped for a red light. I was making my way to the limit line when a young lady decided she needed to force her way from the right lane to the left lane. I admit I was in no immediate danger, but I was looking in her mirror. She wasn't looking. That, um, "upset" me. Therefore, I pulled along side her, gave her the meanest you're-an-inconsiderate-idiot-are-you-trying-to-kill-me look I could muster from within a full face helmet and proceeded to go around her protruding bumper. Ah, but it was a tight fit. Not wanting to touch the Suburban she was trying to wedge behind, I "walked" my bike though the gap. I must have started with the wrong foot, because at about the third step I felt my right leg caught between the piping hot exhaust pipe and the girl's bumper. I hit the throttle and quickly powered out of the bind. It smarted. It left a mark that eight months later still reminds me of Romans 12:17-21. When I seek vengeance for myself, I'm the one that gets burned.

Respectful

OK guys and gals, let's have a quick run-down of why we should be respectful. Reason number one: Scripture says so. Do we need another reason? No, we don't. But here is number two:
Just as a husband giving lingerie to his wife is gift to himself, a wife giving respect is giving herself a gift.

As we prepare to give respect, we should know something of what we are giving. In the context of Eph 5:33, the word translated respect in the ESV is more often translated as some form of the word fear in the rest of the New Testament. This word is also very similar to the word translated as reverence (fear in the NASB) in Eph 5:21.

We can see that what we are giving is closely tied to fear. That your husband uses his strength to give you bear hugs in love rather than a full nelson in anger should be proof that he is at least somewhat respectable. Wives may want to remember this as they show respect. Your respect should be unconditional in Christ, just as you expect his love for you to be unconditional.

"But what are some ways I might show my husband respect?" you might be asking. Just as different guys feel disrespected by different things, so also they see respect in different ways.

Let me start with rule number one: Don't fake it. Empty flattery doesn't do anybody any good. I mean really, have you seen American Idol Laugh Out Loud night?

Second, watch how he shows respect. Remember, respect is love. Therefore, like a "love language" the way he likes to give is most likely the way he likes to get. Does he use titles such as "my Pastor" or "my wife" instead of names? Then try "My husband is wonderful." Remember rule one, of course.

Third, and maybe the hardest one, do Eph 5:22-24.

Happy 7th Birthday, Karissa.

Karissa is the oldest of my three kids. In honor of her B-day today my lovely bride Tricia put together this little video history. We have two more B-days over the next few weeks. So figure this is one of three.

Respect is Love

Great nations built from the bones of the dead
With mud and straw, blood and sweat,
You know your worth when your enemies
Praise your architecture of aggression

~Megadeth~

I sell tools to mechanics for a living. The tattoo above belongs to Tony, one of my preferred customers. As you might expect, he is respectful, respectable and respected. Like most men I know, you know what to expect with Tony. Respect. Men respect men because they are men.

But the ladies may not have this intuitive understanding. Some of the fairer sex may not realize that when men are asked to choose between, "Would you rather feel alone and unloved OR would you rather feel inadequate and disrespected by everyone?" 75% choose alone and unloved.

Now I should mention that in this survey by Shaunti Feldhann (in For Women Only) many men felt there was no real choice, because respect is love. Is everyone beginning to understand why we have gender specific commands in Eph 5:22 and Eph 5:33?

So, ladies, you probably want to know how to avoid disrespecting the men in your life. That is kind of tricky, because different guys are offended by different things. Therefore you will probably treat him with a lack of respect at some point. How will you know? Here is your clue: Watch his countenance. Disrespect is often met with anger. Sometimes that anger manifests as a change of tone, sometimes as silence, and sometimes as walking away. If you see these responses, you may be able to figure out which things push his button.

Think about what Tony said about this topic, "Without respect, there is nothing to build on."
Can I get an Amen?

In my next installment, I'll try to deal with giving respect.

One of those weeks...

Thanks for dropping by y'all. This week has been hectic, hence no posting. But I do have one in the wings I'll touch it up today and should have it up tonight. Thanks for understanding. Y'all come back now ya hear.

Lingerie as a Motivator

A while back, I mentioned Eph 5:25-28 and focused on being washed in the Word. But I can't stop thinking about that passage.

It seems to me that there is more than one source of motivation for actually loving my wife as Christ loves the church.

The first reason is because Scripture says so... That is a sufficient reason in and of itself. The second reason is a bonus... It's the same reason husbands buy their wives lingerie.

So why would a healthy, well-adjusted husband go out of his way to shop in the most feminine store (or part there of)? Why would he take the time to find that perfect outfit that conceals what she doesn't like but still makes the most her beauty?

I'll tell you why this husband does it. It is a present to myself. Yes, she gets the outfit. She gets the adoring attention. But I get her, presented to me in splendor.

My Jung Test

Just for giggles, I took a Jung test online. They never seem quite right to me.

So here are the results. I'm a pretty odd duck, so I believe the 4.3% part.

ESTP - "Promotor". Action! When present, things begin to happen. Fiercely competitive. Entrepreneur. Often uses shock effect to get attention. Negotiator par excellence. 4.3% of total population.

Free Jung Word Choice Test (similar to MBTI)
personality tests by similarminds.com

Captured Thoughts

Mr. Hatfield of Voice of Vision, reminded me of a kind of epiphany I had awhile back. Of course it was recent enough that it's kind of embarrassing to admit that it took so long to get "It".

I have seen many areas of growth in my life as a Christian. But there are other areas that are a constant fight. One of these areas is my thought life. Knowing I was supposed to hold every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5), I would try to put the full nelson on every evil thought that came to mind and put it out of commission before it could grow into action. It was a rough life, full of failure.

Then one afternoon I was meditating upon Philippians 4:8. That is when it struck me. I was trying to hold the wrong thoughts captive! My wrestling with the wrong thoughts left little room to wrestle with the thoughts of God.

It has been amazing. The more I fill my mind with thoughts of God, really soaking in His Word, the less room there is for evil. As I think of my family, I see God at work more often. As I look at the world, I see more opportunity and less temptation. I see my works less and less and Christ in me more and more.

Scars of the Past

As you might imagine, the first time I read Romans 13 as a new believer my old identity was smashed to bits. If you haven't guessed it yet, that's my arm in the picture. A lasting reminder of the old man.

During the last eight years of my old life, I picked up my Bible less then a dozen times because I knew it was the word of God. I knew it would show me where I was in error, and I would be compelled to change. At the time, I wanted to pursue the pleasures of the world. I know what it means to be a stiff-necked (2 Chronicles 30:8) person.

In a sense, reading the Bible still scares me, because there I encounter God, the ultimate authority... one to whom all glory is due and to whom every knee shall bow. It is the faithfulness and mercy of God that gives me courage. This is the kind of courage needed to read Colossians 3 and be encouraged to leave the old man behind.

There's is an older Stavesacre song lyric that nails it for me.

Holding Nothing

I figure every one knows the story of the wealthy young man of Matthew 19:6-22. I realize that the common view is that he went away sad and was never redeemed. While I admit that is very likely, the text leaves me a little short of that conclusion.

Let me reveal a little about myself, and how these verses have ministered to me.

About twelve years ago, I was alone in my room. Under the influence of some pretty harsh drugs, God smacked me upside the head. (No, I don't think it was the drugs talking.) I had made a profession of faith some thirteen years prior in a Jr. High youth group. But this night, I had the distinct impression that I was "self-medicating" to cover the pain caused by my own disobedience. Namely, I had tried to take back the life I had already given up to God.

God condescended to rescue me that night. It was a night of immense joy. It was also a night of immense sorrow. After the "Yes, LORD, I am Your possession." I asked, "What more must I do to be complete?" I understood I had to leave everything behind and follow Him. This included all my friends...the type of friends that would not only die for me, but kill also. We were closer than kin. The cost to me, at that time, seemed high. It was all I had, and it broke my heart to obey. But as you know it was but a momentary and light affliction when compared to the glory set before me (2 Cor 4:17).

My brothers and sisters, this is not the only time I have found it necessary to give up that which I loved for the cause of drawing close to my Savior.

More recently, I left a church that is, in my opinion, dying on the vine. But it was a church that allowed me to work on my gift (as modest as it might be) of preaching and teaching. Yet, the majority of the preaching left my family unfed. I could not continue to neglect the spiritual health of my family. I believe my family is my primary ministry, and preaching is secondary. Therefore, even though it saddened me (in some respects) to do so, I moved my family to a wonderful and vibrant church... one where my chances of preaching or teaching (given the depth of talent available) is slim to none. But the resulting spiritual growth in my family (self included), has meant that my "sacrifice" was no sacrifice at all.

By now, I suppose, you can understand why I don't necessarily see "he went away sorrowful" as "he went away to never obey and be condemned to hell." May we all, if called to, give up whatever holds us back from being complete.

Links; Gratuitous and Otherwise

I'm hoping my favorite international commenter Ann, can shed some light on this one(third snippet down), what do some Swedish girls have against guys? (Actually, I just wanted an excuse to throw a link her way.) Talk about the feminization of men, who will be left to take out the trash or work on the car? All I have to say is Jack won't sit and neither will I.


I'm really glad that Dan Phillips, a blogger who's readership greatly exceeds my own has taken up the cause, the eradication of the most annoying catch phrase of the decade.


I'm also quite pleased that Frank Turk has taken up the other cause of the decade. Go ahead, sign it. All the cool people are doing it.